Maul Stanley Interviews Alex Grossi!

In honor of the 30th anniversary of the Star Wars saga, Maul Stanley has conducted a series of interviews with various rock stars regarding their own unique Star Wars experiences. What follows is a transcript of the intergalactic communiqué between Maul Stanley and Quiet Riot guitarist Alex Grossi, who had somehow managed to live the first 30 years of his life without ever having seen a Star Wars movie.

That is, until now.

Alex Grossi, are you a Star Wars fan?

I actually just watched my first Star Wars movie this week! It was Episode IV, which I was told is actually the first one, so I was a little confused. I kept walking up and down the aisles of my local Best Buy, saying that I needed the first Star Wars movie and they gave me Episode I. I said, "No, I need the first one! I need Episode IV!" It was like some bad Abbott and Costello routine. Finally I told them that I wanted the one with the dude from the Indiana Jones movies and they knew just what I meant.

What is it like watching a 30-year-old movie for the first time as a 30-year-old person?

It's kind of like looking through you dad's old Playboy collection. You open one up and wonder if they had razors back then! So I did watch it, I just don't think I really got it.

Give Maul Stanley one reason not to destroy you.

Well, maybe it would have worked better if I'd watched them in numerical order, you know? I suppose it's like being introduced to Kiss but having your first album be "Lick It Up." You're missing so much that came before it! That album featured Eric Carr and Vinnie Vincent but before them there was Peter Criss and Ace Frehley. There was also make-up and fire and explosions and a bunch of other cool stuff. Kiss and Star Wars actually have a lot in common.

You have redeemed yourself with the Kiss analogy, Alex Grossi.

Thank you.

Did you have any preconceptions about Star Wars heading into the experience?

Well, the advertising does not lie. There are stars and there are wars. Everything they promise you is in there, you can't really ask for more than that! When I watched Star Wars, I saw people fighting in outer space. I saw "star wars." So in that respect, it completely lived up to my expectations.

Do you have a favorite Star Wars character?

At first I was thinking maybe Princess Leia because not only is she pretty hot, she's also the only chick in the entire movie. But I think I have to give the honor to my man Darth Vader! Sure, he can't breathe very well but he can still choke a guy from across the room. He fucks with people! Plus, he dresses all in black, which is pretty much all I ever wear myself. So I'm going to have to go with the one and only Darth Vader as my favorite character.

Do you have a favorite line, moment or scene from any of the Star Wars films?

I think I was mostly just intrigued by the fact that so many characters had British accents. I mean, where did THAT come from? Why British? Why not German? Why were they all speaking like they came from Sheffield? That's probably a question only a die-hard Star Wars fan could answer.

Do you have any Star Wars collectibles?

Just the one DVD! However, you'll be glad to know that I do have lots of Kiss collectibles! I have all four "Psycho Circus" action figures, each with its own unique circus sidekick. I also have a telephone that plays "Detroit Rock City" when it rings!

Would you like your Kiss action figures to face off against Maul Stanley's Star Wars action figures?

Well, I normally just have my Kiss figures face off against each other! I like to pit Gene against Paul to see who comes out on top.

Do you see any similarities between what you do with Quiet Riot and what George Lucas did with Star Wars?

I think everybody in the entertainment business is simply trying to be as creative as they can be. I'm doing it, George Lucas is doing it, everybody's doing it. Even Gene Simmons has been keeping the Kiss machine rolling for some 30 years now. It's the same basic premise with a different cast of characters.

Alex Grossi, what do you bring away from your very first Star Wars experience?

It was kind of like eating sushi for the first time. Everyone is always saying that if you try it, you'll like it. Well, I tried it... but I didn't really like it. I'm sorry, I wanted to like it! I really did! You can't say I didn't try! You have to give me credit for that! If nothing else, seeing Star Wars got me this interview with the magnificent Maul Stanley, which I consider a great honor.

Maul Stanley grants you a reprieve.

Thank you, your highness.

Further information on Alex Grossi is available at his website: